Guru Ram Das's Marriage

Guru Amar Das had two sons (Mohan and Mohri) and two daughters (Dani and Bhani). Bibi Bhani was the youngest and most beloved child of Guru Amar Das. When it was time to arrange the marriage of Bibi Bhani, Guru Amar Das's wife struggled to find a suitable match. At the time Bhai Jetha (the future Guru Ram Das) was about eighteen years old. Bhai Jetha was humble and hard working and had an excellent personality.

Bibi Bhani

Bibi Bhani, was from her earliest years fond of prayer and seclusion. When her young girl companions would invite her on a pleasant day in summer to go with them to indulge in the pastime of the swing, she would inform her father, who invariably gave her permission. At the same time he would remind her of the following composition of his own;

"The world is dead through pride, the proud have no means of living. One who walks as it pleases the Guru, shall obtain the dignity of eternal life. They who fix their attention on God's feet shall live for ever. Nanak, when one who looks on all with favour, dwells in the heart, the pious person is easily absorbed in God."

Bibi Bhani used to say to her playmates, "We are thoughtless beings like the skipping and playing lambs while the butcher Death stands over us." She would then recite Guru Nanak's lines, "This message is sent to every house, such invitations are always issued. Remember the Caller; Nanak, the day is approaching."

False Is Human Wealth

By this Bibi Bhani meant that Death stood ready for its victims, and it was a mistake to think too much of earthly pleasures. Her mother, who used to accompany her, would then say, "By Guru Nanak's favour remain free from anxiety. What fear do you have of Death? The Guru has granted his Sikhs happiness in this life and salvation in the next, and has commanded them to remember God."

A faithful Sikh once asked the Guru's permission to offer Bibi Bhani money to purchase dresses and ornaments, so that she might decorate herself like other girls, and not appear at a disadvantage in their company. On hearing about the offer Bibi Bhani repeated Guru Nanak's words;

"False is gold, false is silver, false are those who wear them." And, reminded the Sikh that the best use to which money could be applied, would be to fill the Guru's kitchen with corn and supply the necessities of Sikhs.

A Bridegroom Like Bhai Jetha

One day the Guru's wife, seeing Bibi Bhani playing, remarked to her husband that they ought to search for a husband for Bibi Bhani. Guru Amar Das ordered the necessary search to be made. When a Sikh of the Guru was made ready to depart and begin the search, Bibi Bhani's mother saw Bhai Jetha nearby conducting his chores. On attentively observing him, she said to the Sikh, "Search for a youth like Bhai Jetha to be Bibi Bhani's husband."

When Guru Amar Das heard this, the Guru ordered the Sikh to pause. On considering what his wife had just said, the Guru exclaimed, "Bhai Jetha is his own parallel, for God has made none other like him. Why not marry Bibi Bhani with Bhai Jetha?" Guru Amar Das spoke to Bhai Jetha, who felt most honoured by the proposal. On being satisfied with the boy's replies and his desire to marry Bhani, the Guru sent him with marriage presents to his father, Hari Das, in Lahore.

After the completion of the nuptial negotiations Guru Amar Das wrote to Hari Das that the twenty-second of Phagan, Sambat 1610, would be a suitable time for the marriage. All the Sodhis congregated together, and there were great rejoicings. Women sang the Guru's hymns, and bards exhibited their poetical skill. The bridegroom's procession was formed, he was put on horseback, and he and his friends proceeded in state to Goindwal.

A Request

Mohri, the Guru's eldest son, went forth to receive him. As the bridegroom was about to enter the Guru's house, Guru Amar Das said to him, "My son Jetha, it is the custom of our family that before the bridegroom enters the bride's house he should make a request. Make one accordingly." Bhai Jetha accordingly repeated the first hymn of the Gujari measure contained in the Rehras Sahib.

Guru Amar Das, highly pleased at the request conveyed in the earnest language of the hymn, granted Bhai Jetha a present of the Name, promised that at his court it should be unceasingly heard, and that it should flow like a current of waters.

When the marriage was duly celebrated, the marriage procession returned to Lahore. Bhai Jetha's parents wished the young couple to live with them according to the usual custom of the East, but Bhai Jetha considered the Guru as his god, and himself as his worshipper. He did not think of him at all in the light of a father-in-law, a relation who is ordinarily treated with scant respect by Indian bridegrooms.

Bhai Jetha Settles In Goindwal

Bhai Jetha deemed parting from Guru Amar Das even worse than expulsion from heaven, and accordingly returned with his wife to Goindwal after a short sojourn in Lahore. In his heart he believed that the foundation of love sprang from the Guru's lotus feet, and he used to pray, "May I abide from beginning to end in the joy of your lotus feet!"

After his return to Goindwal he was the same Bhai Jetha, and performed the same service for the Guru as before, without a particle of false pride in his heart. The more Bhai Jetha served the Guru, the more his love for him and for all mankind increased. His disposition became divine, as when iron is turned into gold by the contact of the philosopher's stone.

Bhai Jetha specially laboured at the Baoli which Guru Amar Das was constructing. He made no objection to carrying baskets of earth on his head, and paid no heed to the banter or reproaches of his companions. The Guru took special notice of his conduct, and showed him special favour.

Children

Bibi Bhani not only considered Guru Amar Das her father, but also her Guru, the very image of Guru Nanak. In the same way she served Bhai Jetha not only as husband but as a saint.

In the month of Assu, Sambat 1614, a son, Prithi Chand, was born of the marriage. Three years after, in the month of Har, a second son, Mahadev, made his appearance. On Tuesday, the seventh day of the dark half of Vaisakh, Sambat 1620, Bhai Jetha and Bibi Bhani were blessed with a third son called Arjan, at whose birth there were unusual rejoicings.

Gurdwara Sri Chaubara Sahib Goindwal

(approximate location) Goindwal Sahib, Tarn Taran, Punjab, India.

Associated with Sri Guru Amar Das Ji, Sri Guru Ram Das Ji, Sri Guru Arjan Sahib Ji.
Gurdwara Sri Chaubara Sahib Goindwal was the home of Guru Amar Das and his family. Many Sikh related events occurred here.

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